Nutrition expert visits Rome

Master of irony, Robert Mugabe, has decided to grace the Food and Agriculture Organisation summit with his presence. FAO should be honoured. If anyone can talk with authority about the horrors of food shortages created through incompetence or malice, it's the tinpot tyrant democratically elected leader of Zimbabwe. The photograph above shows him leaving his five-star hotel in Rome to welcome his many Italian admirers with open arms, as popular leaders are wont to do. Don't worry, he's only pretending to look shit-scared. The fact that his expression recalls that of Ceausescu the last time he appeared on his balcony is pure coincidence.

Oh yes, if you'd like to see what his well-built chums did to the person who took this photograph (or, more probably, one of his colleagues), you should click here. No, unlike Peter Tatchell, he wasn't trying to make a citizen's arrest; he was just doing his job. Still, it might have been worse. He might have been trying to take a picture of 'Amazing' Grace Mugabe, the great man's wife, and been handbagged. Those Gucci buckles can do a lot of damage.